(28th of Dec)

• The second time did that to him after he has taught me how to be an experienced... *cough cough*
• Improvement was rewarded with a lot of....*cough cough again*
• Talked at the park and he did most of the talking
• Mexican restaurant wasn't open that day so we ended up eating at that Japanese restaurant
• Clumsy me dropped the spoon on the floor before I started to eat my noodles
• Somebody couldn't get on the earlier train after he took me to rivy because of me, who made him catch the second train which came after 20 minutes>.>
• sowieeeee..>.>  

(27th of Dec)

Jogging in the sunny day made me feel so refreshed but sad thing was, I wore the wrong pair of shoes=.= I didn't even notice I was with my blue platforms til I was close to the park...>.> That added so much effort for me to run 3km today :S was even scared that I would trip over for the entire half an hour..

When I saw a plane flying over my head during my break, it aroused so much feelings of nostalgia. I started to recall the first day I came to Australia, and my arrival has brought so many changes to my life later on. The new home seems much more attractive than where the immigrants are from, but that's what I thought too, until then variation of experiences has told me how significant my life has turned over to make those changes. To migrate to Australia has always been a long process, my family was also in that long waiting queue back in almost 20 years ago.

However, someone became the reason for her to give up that opportunity to move to a foreign country when I was born. The same person eventually became another reason to make her completely make up her mind to start a new life when I was 12. The emotional maturity I have developed was much faster than those years I was under someone's shelter in my own country. In here, I only had myself, to confront any kinds of problems, even for those that were much beyond a 12-year-old kid's ability to handle.

I become so negative, angry, irritated at times but after all, I accept everything in the end. Any problems are potential problems you might have in the later years, I might just have them much earlier in my age at some points....So why can't we think about making those unpleasant changes to something beneficial for us to feel better..

Boxing day..(26th of Dec)

• Had a deep talk with mum about panpan, who doesn't seem that mature in her eyes..
• I tried to defend him in a way that he's still a kid, but you just can't help to change who she thinks he is when she's a damn picky person
• I couldn't go jogging in the morning as it was rainy, instead I had my half an hour exercise session at home, which was great as I got to do something even though I couldn't jog.
• Her bf was supposed to take us to the grounds Alexandra to have a big Christmas meal. But then it wasn't open today after we took a 40 minute drive to get there. He suggested to go Thai restaurant in Bondi, then again, it was a bit further and would have been taking ages to drive there, yet we weren't even sure if the restaurant he took us to was open or not. He finally made up his mind to take us to somewhere closer, Cronulla. However, the Thai restaurant he took us there was full LOL...
• It was so retarded to have a good meal in a public holiday as the restaurants were either close or full...There wasn't any room for three people unless we waited for an hour=.=
• Although choosing one restaurant was pretty frustrated for three of us, we three had a pretty good time in the car. He has been telling mum how much he misses Africa and loves the time when mum was still working at the same place as him before, the time they both could see each other more, much more than now. I, was the biggest light bulb sitting at the back, listening to their adorable dialog, and giggled. 
• The last Thai restaurant he took us to was in Rockdale. Those four dishes we ordered worth the price, as mum said, the massive amount of seafood they put in was quite satisfying. Everything was with good taste except the fried ice cream, which was relatively disappointed..
• He's the one that turns mum into a kiddy-like person whenever he's there. But thanks for him, who has brought lots of joys for mum. When two people are simple minded, no matter how hard for them to communicate with each other, that wouldn't cause too much problems between them. Perhaps their love has proved how great a simple life could be... 

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!

LOL SUPERRRRRRRR DELAYED POST HERE WOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOO (now it's actually 5th of Jan and I still haven't updated this post....sowieeeeeeeeee panpan >3<)

MERRRRRRYYYYYYY CHRISTMAS...HOPE EVERYONE SPENT A GREAT CHRISTMAS LAST YEAR :3

Before we both went to sleep, le panpan sent a Christmas letter to his korara. It would be one of the most important events I gotta spend with him. First of all, thanks for being there with me today...

Eric texted me when I was waiting for panpan at Central. He is still the really caring brother that I've ever had in here, asking if I wanted to go to his house and spend Christmas with others together if I had no one to be with :3

Panpan arrived, took me to that sushi place in market city. We gobbled up 20 dishes of sushi. As panpan said, I am the sushi terminator, but I terminate raw seafood as one of my favourites sushi types. It was rather embarrassing when clumsy me again, couldn't hold a glass of water tight and that glass jumped, and made water spit onto the lady who sat next to me. >.>

After lunch, or brunch. We went galaxy world. No matter what kinds of games we played, I have never won this person for once...He was evil enough to make my car spin around to the max during bumper cars' games. Knowingly I would be a helpless girl getting bullied by someone like him, who loves to bump cars so much, I still wouldn't like the idea to be with someone in the same car...Playing alone is much cooler. Killing bf is not an exception hahaha

The pool place was fine in Christmas since I haven't been playing pool with him in ages. Surprisingly I won the second game. That's what I remember as I have never won him but today. But it was all pure luck, and he actually was gone a bit worse, as he said. He taught me how to play proper pool by asking me to practice with 9 balls, and I needed to hit them in order. Though it has always been quite humiliating to make fun of by him because my pool is too shit to let anyone see haha, it was just a lesson being taught by someone that's better than you heaps. I did learn something.

The second last destination we went was St James, which it said there would be a light projection show nearby. However, the only light projection there was the Christmas tree. Supposedly the Church should have been the one that with light projection all around, we saw no signs. It might be the rain that caused light projections cancel. But we still took a few photos under the rain.

You think we should have eaten something big in Christmas? I thought that too but we ended up having KFC lol The restaurant he wanted to take me to was close during public holidays, same with other restaurants. Eating in KFC was my idea because I wanted to save more time to talk to him afterward. We ordered some wicked wings and something else such as burger. That burger is really called 'burger' lol

He then took me home so we basically had our meal on the train while he was happily sharing his recent stories with me. His friend who has this fettish of traps, and some of his other friends on Skype. I didn't talk much as usual but I could feel how happy he was when he shared this part of stories with me. Arrived in Rivy, we went down there in my flat to chat. By talking about betrayal, we could have been in the similar situation before with our exes so I suddenly found a reason to treat this person nicer. But I wouldn't believe he would take that long to forget his ex, because for me, a flirty person like him is able to move on easily lol

I didn't get to see the light projections in city, and silence has always been there between us. Christmas, a silent Christmas...But at least, I have done something with someone, unlike the saddest truth of mine in a year, when I actually felt the time fly away because incalculable things happened in my life, and that has already made me forget how to enjoy something I should have enjoyed..

Merry Christmas again...sorry for the super delayed post...thank you and wuv you :)

Christmas Eve, Family time

It's rare that she got invited by her friend to go yumcha in the morning. I went to market city with her to wait for her long lost friend, who used to work with her in China back in 30 years ago. half an hour later, he came with his wife. They both ate so little, his wife talked so little. I was right beside mum busy playing her iPhone while both of them have been recalling the past all this time...

As mum's been looking for the massage chair, he directed her to level 2 and tried the ones there first. It was too good to let it go, we love how it relieves tension in our back, feet, mostly the whole body, only the price is not affordable for a family like us. 

The quality of Cotton on's pj, undies and bras are so damn good with super low price, so it wasn't strange for her to shop around for nearly 3 hours in such a shop with ideal style and price at the same time. 

The work is done, the shopping is done, time to have some family time in this Christmas Eve. The church is the best and first place I can think of to take mum to. It offered free food and freebies for everyone despite we ain't Christians. For laid-back kind of atmosphere that mum and I enjoyed the most in the church event was the carol, the songs were all musically played with piano that brought us with a sense of belonging to the ones who were Christians there. 

I like how the weather turned to be a bit cooler with rain, but not that heavily pouring. That's how a Christmas should be like. Mum recorded a few videos, though it was rather embarrassing to turn around because I was actually upsetting about something. Looking back to the past years, I was full of all sorts of feelings well up in my minds by thinking about how much I have changed to who I am now, and how there was so much for me to overcome with emotion. Looking at the one that was next to me, my mum, who's been here for me all these 21 years, and I finally get to spend a Christmas Eve with her this year. I was saddened by the carol, which accentuated my isolation from what I got from separation in the past, yet without all these, I might have never known the increasingly deep feeling within me growing stronger and stronger to my forever love one, she's there, for me, and she'll never leave.

Badminton...(23rd of Dec)

We are Asians, we live for Badminton, one of the popular Asian sports... I was the only one girl in my group playing badminton there. Apparently they showed no mercy, they never did anyways. One of my partners was being a meanie saying 'I don't want yisha...can I team up with guys?' =.= That's why I hate Harry so damn much...so damn much..

During my breaks, Eric lent me his phone to play Cytus, and I got addicted to it, so I never went back to play badminton again (jokes...but I did spend my half an hour playing it..>.>) *that's what games do to people..*

3 hours passed, my legs were sore, so sore, to the point that I couldn't walk up the stairs and needed someone to support me at the back. 

Indecisive them spent more than 20 minutes to decide where we were going to eat. I've never thought about guys could be this indecisive, even hoping they could take me to eat somewhere new. Yes, they definitely did, we were supposed to get scrumptious beef which was 50% off that day. However, we ended up going to that old Viet restaurant as I left my wallet at home, and my ID was inside...Without ID, they said to us 'I could let you guys in but that girl has to leave' Then Eric said to them 'But, but but but but she's the oldest among all of us' LOL...>.> Am I such a troublemaker to my friends?=.=

I took a long time to read through the menu as I didn't know what to pick..Eric came to me, picked something for me and paid for me..Brother is still the best, as always..

I sat at the same table with Eric and David. Later Eric asked David if there is anyone he likes, he then answered him with 'no point'...For some reason, I saw Eric had a glance at me then I quickly lowered my head silently eating my noodles...To break the silence, he continued to ask him if he's with Mariessa, a girl that I first introduced her to David. They subsequently became best friends, I still remember how I regarded this as he stole her from me. David's denial has become the biggest mystery to me since he can never be open up to me again, I doubt that if they have ever been together yet do not want to tell the truth because I was also there listening.

After the dinner, I was more than forced to play werewolf game with them at the back. Half an hour was already gone by the time Brian finished explaining his so-called more complicated version of werewolf. Jeff started to lose his patience, said 'Can we start now? The restaurant is nearly close..=.=' LOL ouch....Brian ignored him, continued to explain further strategies of how to play this game well lol...I love how they interact ed hahaha

Btw I didn't go home earlier as I should have as I was sitting in the middle between Harry and Jeff, those two meanies that I dislike the most...=.= My innocence is the weapon to be a successful undercover werewolf in this case, nobody has ever eliminated me as a suspect in two games. Eric played it so well as each time when he tried to explain his logic of who is the real werewolf here, the provision of his evidence is plausibly supported according to others' statements.

As I was afraid that I couldn't get home by 10:30, I left them first but Eric and Jeff appeared at the same platform after 5 minutes I arrived there. We got on the same train, three of us played several games of big two. We dropped off from Wolli Creek, Eric asked who I would spend xmas with during the time we waited for another train to come. I fell asleep once I got on the train, I felt someone blew my hair and I was pretty sure it was Jeff because I heard Eric said 'Let her sleep..' By the time I woke up, I saw Eric playing with his phone. I moved closer to watch him playing, the next thing he did was to pause, and help me to tuck my hair behind my ear as my hair became so messy after I leaned on the train sleeping. Thanks Eric, who's been there for me all these years..

uhh..what a day...(22nd of Dec)

Another super delayed post here...I was late for 25 minutes to reach Ashfield. He took me to his friend, Ivy's house and I sat there being a loner, knowing nobody there and occasionally asked people if they needed some help. Anna, the one with glasses asked me to untie the apron for her, Eunice came and only got to talk to her a bit. The birthday girl greeted me but we didn't talk that much, everyone seemed to be so busy helping. After those guys knew I am panpan's gf, they surrounded me and introduced themselves though I hardly remember most of their names. Overall I am bad at remembering people's faces and names..

The day was full of fun if only I could be more actively participating. But I wasn't really in a talkative mood making new friends. I wish I was...

The water gun fight was SHOOOOOOO WETTTT....>.> Some of them ruthlessly poured the whole bucket of water to us from top to bottom, to make us completely soaked wasn't a difficult task at all...Water gun fight can be never boring, it added much more fun to a day under this heat. 

The kris kringle thingy was rather a journey of seeking for treasure, doubt that if it really is a 'treasure' game as it was sort of bothersome to look for one shape within that big park with a failed clue in your hand. But Anna found panpan's one, in return, panpan helped some of them out to look for theirs. 

Panpan received a card game gift for kris kringle. I ripped it open. With a booklet of rules on the floor, we were reading while playing. Here came with a girl in black, who looked pretty badass and asked me if I am his gf...Later on, a question that was rather rude asked by her in the first time we just met. Panpan and I awkwardly laughed at that, and being silent answering nothing.

The pinnata thing was quite amusing in a way by watching people were blindfolded to hit the pinnata hanging in the air. Some of them tried to trick them by lifting up the string which tied up the pirate boat. 

A girl called Vanessa came and talked to me for a few times that day. She's really outgoing and nice from her innocent eyes. 

But I wasn't really that sociable that day. What I did was playing panpan's phone and ipod, and found out something that I wish it could be unseen. I lost my interest to talk to him in our way home. He even wanted to call my mum that he would not come to our house tonight because I was mad at him

As depressed as I was, I cried on the train, cried again at the backyard during the time we talked. Asking about why he's being so flirty to so many girls, especially to the one who actually thought he's being so flirty to herself, and hence intentionally kept distance from him. Yet he still seems so desperate to talk to her for some reason. If this is not an attempt to chase after a girl, I don't know what else can be represented as a sign of liking a person. He did the same thing to me once before we started dating by frequently asking me to webcam, complimenting me, talking to me a lot during breaks or whenever he's free. As a result of all that, we became a couple. Then tell me, how is this not possible to do the same thing OR like other girls when he keeps sending the same signals that gives me quite a bit of insecure feelings. 

 

The first time ever the night talk immensely has built up some bridges between us. I told him what we can do about our problems and what we will do after our anniversary. A deal was made. Truth hurts, but problems are needed to solve after all. 

We were late for dinner because of this. He might have been making himself too comfortable after he came to our house for couple times and that he wasn't considerate enough to act more mature in front of my mum. I always know that it takes time for him to build up his maturity, and I've been knowing that mum has a pretty high standard to everything and everyone, thus delicate things can turn out to be big in her eyes...