Fun ruined (31st of May)

Nan came to my house at 9ish and helped me to check my mum's laptop. I felt really thankful because he helped me with almost everything I needed or I had problems with, including some softwares and unnecessary things that are meant to be removed from my laptop. During those two hours, we were staying in my room chatting about our recent lives and pc related things. He also said that he'd help me to get my new laptop and scanner after he finished his exams. Even mum had a really good first impression of him being a great friend there helping us to solve a lot of problems...

My vivid night wasn't that happy since I was a bit pissed off as I felt like I was ignored again. Yes, he's been super busy, or even stress out as hell. Once he saw me, he couldn't even stop complaining how stressful he has been for the whole day due to a lot of tasks had to be done, as well as he got to give orientation to three new employees etc etc. And I only said that I became even less like to talk to him, he walked away. I didn't grab his hand, but walked straight to chinatown to wait for him to come back. That's drama scene 1. Drama scene 2 was when he started pushing me away after we met at chinatown, which made me even more irritated when that kind of annoyance from being pushed in the public. Yet he never realised how annoying one felt when he did that. I then didn't talk to him at all, even when I was actually asking him to share that fried rice with me. He didn't end up eating, my grumpiness grew even stronger than ever to the point where I started to act like a kid crazily throwing stuff, knocking things and all that. My ultimate anger came right after he took my phone away and I wanted to have it back. After all that happened, we still went to darling harbour to take some pictures and watch that water show. Drama scene 3 was when we went all the way to Townhall to catch the train to Circular Quay, and we bumped into his friends, those two girls were being so friendly encouraged me to go Sunday church with them. Then we found out that there was no trains to go Circular Quay after they left, so we had to walk. The point is, we went to the wrong way and spent another 10 minutes or so to walk all the way back to Townhall. Starting from that time, I couldn't hold my impatience anymore, I had this urge to get away from him for multiple times by walking so fast and trying to disappear in the crowd. Until we reached Opera house where I took plenty of photos from there. But still ignoring him the whole time, he eventually stayed at the same spot and let me leave alone. We texted for another half an hour having this silent argument which we both were pretty much wasting a good hour of having fun in vivid. I admit that I was overly stubborn that I couldn't get over something he called it 'simple'. But still, I went back to look for him, held his hand and hugged him tightly while he was sitting on that fence. Seeing his teary eyes has fully softened my heart quite a bit. He even asked me how I'm going to educate my child if I, already act like one child. Who said I'm going to get married with you?~~>.> In the last one hour, or half an hour, we finally had that bit of time having some fun walking around circular quay. Lastly, ok...I'm sorry for ruining our night. It's so hard to feel right around you because sometimes your attitude makes me really uncomfortable that I lose all my interest to talk, and you complain things as if that's part of my fault... There's just so much that I want to talk about, but yeah...after all, this is a public place...Let's just talk about this privately..

Busy busy Friday (30th of May)

LOL...I love how adorable her gesture was as she was rushing to that train yet we didn't make it..So I went to Kogarah with mum in the really early morning. I already did google where private hospital is last night but after we got off from the train station, I couldn't see that B road where it's supposed to be next to the railway road. I asked a guy who was smoking and he pointed at a right direction where we just needed to go straight. Private hospital in Australia is more of a hotel-like. It doesn't even give me a feel of being in a hospital when the floor is covered with beautiful carpet and everywhere is super clean. I found where that ear department is on floor 3 and I took her to Suite 12. As we've got an appointment, we waited there only for 15 minutes. Dr Kenneth Howiston is a well-experienced ear specialist. Before we actually entered into his room, I was already observing his every move whenever he came out to take something from the receptionist. In comparison to other medical centres which the dr might take a much longer time to see one patient, he only spent approximately less than 10 minutes to do so. He's lovely old man as well when he treats us as if we were his friends once we got in. Funny how he asked her to move to a seat, and I took another seat next to her subconsciously. I didn't realise that it was his seat til he told me he needed to sit on that seat to test out her ear. I was like 'Oh...I am sorrrrrrrryyyy >.<' to my stupidity. He soon turned into a friendly one laughing at my naughtiness and asked if I was the boss at home. We had a chat during the time he was taking that huge fungus out of her right ear with his equipment. That little circular thing he was looking into is seemingly like a magnifier for him to see what's inside of her ear, he slowly pushed that long stick-like equipment inside and spinned it around, her facial expression instantly changed from neutral to painful in a few seconds. 'It's really big ey. It has been there for years.' I said. He then joked around with me 'Is it made in Vietnam?' 'loooll....yesssss but not Vietnam, we are Chinese' xD Soon he pulled it out from her ear shortly that I've never thought it'd be this easy to solve it. This problem has been bothering her for more than 20+ years, even before when I was born. And because of that, it has reduced her hearing quite a bit. I've never mentioned this to anyone but now, everything's good. You know how le feel when a blind person suddenly is healed? That's how she felt having her normal hearing back. The world is bright and clear, her mood is even brighter. Dr Howiston then asked us to wait for another short while outside. Then another lady asked us to go into another room, and did her a hearing test. She was locked inside that enclosed area where she was asked to put on a huge headset, and pressed the button whenever she heard some sounds. Another 10 minutes of waiting for the result analysis from Dr Howiston, he called us in, told her that her right ear would not be a problem anymore, and that now the next thing she had to do is to get a drop he prescribed for her from the pharmacy and see him for another test next Tuesday. The result was positive, she felt great, greater than great. She even told him how happy she felt and shook the dr's hand to thank him for everything he did for her today. It was one of the glorious moments of her being brave talking to someone in English lol I was also surprised that she'd make such a move. 'Wow...mum....you speak English to the...doctor?' o3o She then called fatty from oversea right after we left the hospital.

We shopped around Kogarah for another 2 hours. This was also my second time to come here. The first time was when I had my HSC Japanese speaking exam in Jame's cook boys. We had our happy family time having smoke salmon sushi together. A random who was sitting next to us asked us about iPhone as she was using it. Then we moved to that Christopher's cake shop to get a Dutchess cake. I love the chocolate and biscuit mix as well as how it looks. I shared half of it with mum, and she complimented me for saying I've become more and more caring these days.

In the afternoon, she took me to Woolies again because she needed my help to read the instructions of the products she wanted. I followed her to get those products that were placed under that screen. Promotion does work this way as you can see, even my mum was attracted to their new products whenever they are out. The large size of ceramic frying pan was all sold out though. She ended up getting one of those things... (???...I forgot how you call that...=3=) I only found that a bit annoying after we came back home, she unwrapped the product, found it too sharp to use, and asked me to go back to Woolies asking for a refund...>.>

Anyways..Being unable to use that printer due to the CD for installation is not windows 7 to match my laptop, I had to hand-write for my tutoring material which has taken me for almost 2 hours, a much longer time than usual. Yes it's really time for us to get a new laptop...soon...really really soon...

So hmm....Other than a bit of frustration I got from not having a printer home during my assignment and exam period, my day has been alright, I guess. I did some productive work, read some online news the rest of the night, watched a few new episodes of a talk show. This world is really ridiculous to some points where you start to wonder what else we cannot do rather than what we can do. So I read this news about Ukraine, the political outbreak is still existed in the inner city where everyone has been struggling to fight for a unity of the country. And another news is about a girl vows to infect 2000 men HIV for revenge in Kenya...I don't get how crazy one could be when she becomes ultimately cynical, but now I understand there is no limit if you exceed that point where you think insanity is the only way to solve your problem, and that is also the only way to make you feel better. But not considering what others feel can never be right. Anyways my PH mate has added me tonight. Yes, the photographer that I saw from that PH running man event last time. That guy found me on fb eventually lol Oh and and and of course I am going to that tree top adventure park as I've never been to one!!! >3< Horrayyy...I'm looking forward to having my holidayssssss....also...I'm invited to a camping in July by him. It'd be a good choice to stay :)

Lastly... panpan felt damn sleepy once he got home. He wanted to webby with me so badly somehow so I found it quite strange o3o And I did at the end before we both went to sleep. Le feel was great when you watched your own bf's sleeping face on the screen while you're also lying down on your bed. His face is just shooooooo kawaii that I want to touch it :3 well, sleep tight panpan >3< korara misses you le x3

Collaborative work (29th of May)

So we watched quite a few animated videos in the lecture. I like the Gorillaz one the most. Not saying the other two aren't good, but the music video is so catchy that the song is still remained in my head o3o...Kael only came after we finished our lecture. Same as usual, he loves to pat my head at the back before I noticed his existence. His storyboard is shoooooo good!!! just shoooo good that I'm jealous!! >3< 

Helen didn't teach anything new today in our digital images class, we were allowed to work on our own assignments that are due next week. I then spent most of my time looking for a high resolution image from that freeimage site. My friends Carson and Jim were next to me started doing their retouching face assignment already. Carson worked effectively though the final result didn't turn out that good. I suggested him to work on his character more because obviously the image he chose doesn't seem to be realistic enough to fit in the background. Jim made the same mistake, but worse. His problem is that he didn't even know how to create the shadow within the mask on top of one layer. I mean, he understands what he has to do, but he doesn't know what's so important about this step. Anyways...those two were talking about a game or an app design for perverted people during that lesson =3= Gino and I kept texting each other when he was on his way to AIT. I even helped him to mark his name for two classes. Well, he was nice enough to get me my burger and a pack of chips from Maccas as well, even though I didn't really ask for it. After he finally came, we continued to work on our storyboards together. I was munching my burger while asking him to fix some minor mistakes he made on his storyboard. 

As we had too much fun in that half an hour, we were even late for the next class for 10 minutes as we forgot about the time. We once again sat together to work on the rest of the task. Helen said that we could hand it in tomorrow, but both of us planned to get ours all done by tonight. As always, collaboration works well for a school project. Reason why Helen gave the class an extra day is that she truly understands us having so much more to do for another course. I'd say she's the best teacher ever in AIT. And I seem to be forming a great relationship with her after she knew that I'm doing my bachelor degree in unsw at the same time. She described me as a champion working so hard and started to chat with me occasionally. She even asked about who's been teaching me and if I know the people she knows from my uni. I'm not surprised that she knows several of my lecturers when I mentioned. Anyways, I recreated another file for those separate sheets for Mickey who asked me for help. And he told me that the printer at AIT wasn't working. I joked about him having this bad luck and not being able to do some easy tasks. He found my humiliation quite insulted, he then poked me so hard on my waist...=3= However, Gino, was next to me watching us playing around, and quietly doing his own work lol I felt extremely sorry for him making 60 panels without knowing the fact that our minimum only requires for 32 panels lool >.> I started to help him out for a bit after I finished mine...So in return, he promised me that he'd help me to submit my printed version tomorrow...such a helpful friend~

A girl in her early 20's was in charge of the following class in the same classroom we stayed. There were only a few students come to her class. I believe that night classes teachers don't need to do much because she even joined the student's talking when they were showing her some strange videos. 

Back home at 7-ish, had my dinner, chilled for a bit by talking to some people online and reading some online news again. Oh and I like the vivid fest article which it has abundant information on some places we should go yet we don't normally go. Lastly another online article about the top 5 regrets people make on their deathbed is something I read tonight. To make this short, what I want to say here is that go ahead and do the things you can/want before it's too late, enjoy your life the best you can, you don't wish for having something, you just do it. 

PS: I know this post is not as great as the previous ones....but sorry...I'm in a rush >3<

Helpfulness (28th of May)

Ok...this will be another super short post. One thing I did today was that I recovered the very last file for my tut task with Gino's help. Yes, I owe him a big time. We had a lot of fun doing our work together during that tut and I am not scared to be late anymore. Because now I've got several friends to support me when I need help. But I skipped my uni classes today even though I went. Instead going to meet senpai in jap, having another epic discussion about media art form changes etc, I was there at the library continuously working on my storyboard that is due tomorrow. I know that if I attended classes today, I wouldn't be have that much energy left for doing my work tonight. Luckily I got that all done within 3 hours as I planned.

However, the only unfortunate thing tonight was that her laptop was unable to turn on. I notice that her laptop has been so weird these days, but didn't know that it's dead this easily within a few weeks time. So my frustration arise from losing one laptop to work on my thingy as well as that is the only laptop for printing when installation takes up quite a long time on my laptop to do its job, I really hope that it doesn't come this quick. But guess you could never ask life for mercy. It comes when it comes. Also considering how my work has to be edited for another few hours. Normally editing job does take a few hours or so since every detail has to reach my perfection. During that time, I was still talking to Seri, asking how he has been and all that, and if he knows how to convert something to something. In most cases, Seri talks a lot. But tonight, he's super talkless as he was also working on his own thing. Then my friend Ailin needed someone to talk to her as she wasn't really in a good mood. Stress comes from every direction as I was told, her tutor might be a bit too mean to the class. I really think that she deserves a much higher mark if only that her chosen topic wasn't that broad. Ahhh and Gino is such a good friend who told me not to worry and all that because he'd be there to help the next day. A chunk of message had made me feel much better. Ok...I should also say that another friend of mine from that hsc group is so helpful, nan has always been the tech savvy one who's ready to help whenever we need him. I got his phone number from Sam who was half joking and half serious gave me his own phone number the first time. Until that a group of friend told me nan's real phone number half an hour later =3= I didn't expect him to come over to have a check on my laptop. I was thinking that I'd go to his house after he finishes his exams and all, so he could check it in the afternoon just like last time.
But he's really a good helper and a caring one that he said he'd come over at 9 or 10-ish in the morning >3< thank you thank you!!!!

Ok...so I got a bit carried away lol this isn't a really short post o3o....

Feel the warmth (27th of May)

Instead of staying home today, I went to AIT to work on my tut tasks with my friend Gino. I went there half an hour earlier and started my work alone at room c12. He came with Tia once they finished their classes. Both of them sat next to me talking about one particular task that they have difficulty with. I asked for his videos recorded from the classes which I needed to learn some techniques that I missed out. Today I even brought my 900gb hard drive for those videos and some of my tut tasks that are required for so much space. Anyways we got our results back for pre-production screen play. To my surprise, it was exactly the same mark as my pitch, they both were 73. I mean, why am I always at the edge of getting distinction...Why can't the marker just give me two more marks=3= Tia, on the other hand, was disappointed at what she got, obviously one mark away from credit, 64, wasn't good enough for her when she aimed for the better in this assignment as she put much more effort in screenplay than the pitch. Her cuteness of being annoyed because of the mark she got, had made Gino and I laugh so much. We both asked her to get over it as the grade is already decided. She then said she needed to ask the lecturer why. We didn't stop her, so she went. 5 minutes later after she came back, she told us that it wasn't the lecturer who marked it, but someone else. Oh and I didn't expect Pai would be coming on Tuesday though. She fb me an hour later and told me that she's on her way to AIT. She came and helped me out a bit with my work too. Gino left, Tia left another half an hour later. Pai was there the whole time with me til 5-ish when she needed to attend her studio class. So we moved to that room. By that time, I almost got 4 of my tasks done. I felt damn happy because the peak productive time for me today let me complete 90% of all the files I lost 2 weeks ago.

I thought that my productivity would be lasted longer tonight. But no. After dinner, my attempt to finish my storyboard was taken away by a lovable video shared on my primary school group on qq. I guess it wasn't just me who had this kind of reaction when my heart seemed to be paused for a second when seeing Hua's documentary of her pregnancy and marriage on Youku. The first scene I saw from her video was when she was giving birth to her baby boy who they named him as Shaqima. I couldn't tell it was her or not in the first a few minutes after all these ten years that I haven't seen her, she has grown a bit different from when she was a bit younger. But her youthfulness has never changed. She's still that mischievous her, even when she got married, her frustration towards her mum reminded me of that little Hua when we were in primary. She had always been a smart one acing everything in our class, the class representative that earned everyone's respect and trust. After all, she was a super good girl back in primary. Until then, she started to hang around with what we called those as 'bad people', because the lack of love she got from her family had huge impact on the following years. Her grade dropped, even another friend of mine and many others surpassed her in their junior year. Later on, she has gradually turned herself into someone that we are no longer familiar with.

And I've barely heard from her until tonight, her share link popped up on qq. I felt damn much especially the part where she mentioned about her family. Her mum was almost cried when she received a call from her saying 'When I got bullied at school, where are you. When I come back home and starve, where are you' Not just me, everyone else is able to relate to that. Regardless how little time we spend with parents, lots of things have driven us apart. We always say that they rather to earn more money than spending time with us. I thought of that too, just like a few years ago when mum couldn't come back home til late every night. That strong loneliness existed every second in my life during that period, once I came back home, I was alone doing everything, even before I slept, I got nobody saying just a simple 'night night' to me. And no, I didn't get to talk to her in the morning either as she still slept in in the morning before I went to school. Therefore, we never got to talk much, and that led me to start seeking love and a lot of caring from others.

Hua is a typical example of someone who chose the wrong path, and she has proved that having a baby in an earlier age does need to overcome so much more than we think. But most importantly is that her husband and her have this courage to confront all the problems they have. They did seem to be so happy being together and expecting that baby boy last year.

Just by watching the little scenes between them two such as the one she was described as a child by him, and I found that so cute when she insisted on saying he did something wrong. How can you not be touched by such a sweetness? Her husband, indeed, loves her dearly. So hmmm..The mixed feeling I have towards what I've watched and heard, and everything comes together led to how I feel about someone that I used to know before, has now become a mother. How time has changed a person? It could be subtle but also big. Maybe now it's really the time for her to be a grown up taking that responsibility to being a mother, and considering what others think. From her video, you interpret more than it shows, the meaningfulness of how life puts you down and how you pick yourself up, how you go through all these problems with all the decisions you make, overall, just what life has created for you. I cried for that, not only because of the production of her video that created that sort of atmosphere, but I had this magnificent feeling, to feel her, and myself. I am really a sentimental one I should say. Last time when Lin came to Sydney for a visit for two days, I already had this feeling that didn't want to let her go. I also cried for her departure on my way back home, as well as the next day when I was on the bus. It's good to reconnect with the old friends to see how they've been. Really, having this bonding, this unity makes so much more different from viewing our lives....I really feel the warmth coming from there, what about you?

Positive energy (26th of May)

Although today's lectures were the last lectures of this semester, I, WAS still late like a boss...(don't judge me>.>) But I made friend with this girl called Virginia in my Jap lecture who was also late for 20 minutes, she talked to me once we both settled down. I didn't realise that she's doing actuarial until she started to do her assignment on her laptop. A strong feeling of disgust arises from seeing a whole page of set of data appeared on her screen. So this smartass came to the lecture only for the attendance lol...Today, we learned about the te form of both verbs and adjectives. To get that right, the lecturer suggested us to sing the song in helping us to memorise the rules well. Oh the last episode of the performance was shooooooo good. I guess everyone can tell that there was a rectangular love formed between those 4 actors lool Jealousy man...so fun to watch this drama yet it actually happens around us...

So hmm there are too many accidents happen each day. Just a few days ago, this 20-year-old student went missing and now he's accused of being murdered by a former detective. And he's somebody's friend's friend btw...what a small small world...Anyways my point is...Please take care of yourself and be safe, love the ones around you, make time for them as you can, nobody knows what will happen tomorrow. Everything could come so sudden. During my 3 hour break, my peak productivity time happened to be in the first 2 hours. The third hour was my catch up time with my dear Karen. She seemed to be so exhausted and sick of uni. But seeing me has made her day I guess. Just from how much she laughed at my recent life, and I was kindly being teased by her for saying I've grown so much taller with my 10cm+ platforms. However, I don't think she'd like to be the light bulb in vivid festival lool She should also feel so much luckier and gladly know that she isn't the only one suffering from over workload and dying from boredom here. I've always been here for her when she needs me, it's just that she doesn't make her first move to contact me. And you know what she said...she said that I should be the one contacting her as I am older...=3= But yeah, it was so glad to have lunch with her. Next time, I should really ask Jenny to come as well :) 

Nothing much to say about the lecture. Well I am not saying it wasn't good. It was really good but I just can't be bothered to type another chunk of paragraph here o3o So hmmm mainly it was about digital documentary in this era where digitalisation presents in an art form stimulating our sensation and feeling. But most of all, it's about how all these sensorium create our experiences at large in certain contexts. New media involve a shift of other built assemblages and coding re-organise, it's said that cultural code can be changed, a set of ecological process can be reformed and an ongoing generative new way of presentation can be innovated. Take a simple example here, Vjing is the dynamism of what images can do with other kinds of inputs. Well, I don't want to bored you guys here, so if you want to know more, check out my media blog link I shared a few days ago :)

Also, I talked to quite a few people tonight. One of them is Gwinny who asked me to apply for that online magazine internship from Mimo. Writing up articles is my thing so why not? :) Jenny has been having difficulties with her landscape course and that she wanted to seek some help from me. Unfortunately I've got no friends that are doing the same courses as her :/ And another friend of mine once again invited me to go to his house. Long story short, I haven't talked to this one for so long. Incase not to feel bad for hiding this, I told panpan about it. Definitely it wasn't a good idea to tell such a thing to your own bf because the rest of the night he was being totally silent, didn't know what to say after he knew it. Well...what would you choose if you were me, honestly to tell what the truth is or hide it for the sake of not to damage the relationship?

PS: good luck to panpan's presentation :)

Be mentally rich (25th of May)

Hmmm...my day started alright-ish, only if I didn't get yelled at by mum for wearing too little in the morning before I left my house. You know, my over-protective dearest will always be worried about my health >.>

Enjoying that 2 hours of tutoring was rare, it only happens when Calvin's attention span is a bit longer than usual lol Today I arrived at Chatswood a bit earlier, had my chicken roll there...Oh they put too much chilli inside though. Jenny asked me to help Calvin with his assignment today. I wasn't really that surprised of his excitement towards his speech since he's a talkative one, who loves to present himself lol One topic was chosen from the list, 'Racism is bullying' was the one he wanted to do the most. Here, we've got something in common because I was going to suggest him to do that topic as well haha After I made some dot points to the main body of his speech, I asked him to think about some examples that have happened in his life. He said to me he has never encountered any of those moments where he was discriminated by people. But I did, so did some others I know. Therefore I share my own personal experience with him and the one that my ESL teacher told me when I was in high school. It was quite saddening when she was only walking on a street, suddenly there was this man in his car yelling at her to go back to her country while throwing a water bottle at her from nowhere. That happened almost 18 years ago, it was the time when she just migrated to Australia. Same as everyone else, we have to learn almost everything from scratch, including some cultural aspects that we didn't know before. For me, my experience is about there was once I went to get a pack of chips from the canteen and I got publicly humiliated by the canteen lady, who said to me 'Here is not Chinese bank, we don't have that much change for you to only get a pack of chips' when I handed her my only 50$ note from my wallet. There was a dragon long line behind me waiting, and I was shamefully standing there like an idiot. I said 'sorry', yet, she was just standing there and being unresponsive. So I ended up walking away having nothing and told my teacher about it. I was almost crying in front of her but I held back all my tears because such a mistreatment will remind me of what I have been through like one of those old times, and that I'd train myself much stronger. Hence, I extremely hate racists. And this happened a few years ago...Anyways back to the point where I told Calvin about my life, he wasn't interjecting at all, but being a quiet listener the whole time. Also, a speech has to be engaging by asking some questions to get the audience involved. This is one of the really basics, so I asked him to think about some before he started another paragraph. We then finished doing the introduction, defined the term and related to the issue of bullying as well as the consequences along with it. And for conclusion, adding a bit of facts to show how bullying might lead to low self-esteem or even self-injury. In addition, we have to take some actions to go against racism to provide a more peaceful environment especially this country, Australia is a multicultural one that consists of hundreds of nationalities. We support for equality and justice among this nation~

Ok....end of discussion of racism...This post isn't all about racism..>.> So I went to get my mango cheesecake for my lunch after tutoring. As I have promised myself last week, I'd explore around Chatswood more from now on :) Btw there was a person got ran over by the train at Chatswood. I only knew that when Jeff posted up 2 photos on fb. But Eric's ruthless comments got me quite shocked....

I guess I didn't really do THAT much work. I did read something and spend most of my time reading online news. So really, the cutting fund program won't have any effect on me, except that I am unsure if my continuity to study for AIT up til 2016 will get me higher loan as well. But I told mum not to worry because nothing can really be planned beforehand when there are so much uncertainties out there. Assuming that by the time I finish my degree from uni, take a part time job and part time/full time at AIT, every problem will be solved by then. Mum no need to worry about whether the rent is affordable, she can still continue with her English course, while my income can lessen a bit of burden of the family. How good is that. We already have pictured how our life will be like in the coming 5 years. Our greatest moment exists when our dinner time is filled up with our dreamful thoughts. We don't compare with the rich because we are way too distant from them, nor don't we compare to the lucky ones, mum said, our luck will come, and I agree with her. My opportunities just aren't arrived yet. I might be as great as the ones I have been envying for so long as well in my future. :) I remember what fatty has always been telling me that 'to be rich, be mentally rich first', and I believe that, our family is mentally rich. We love and are loved...