Towards the end... (20th of October)

We got our presentation result back. Feeling happy that I got a credit for that though I would expect it to be even higher...Taffy and Angela walked with me to upper campus so we talked a bit about assignment and such, including our final essay due next Friday which I haven't even chosen any questions yet...

Studious me invited my friend Kevin to revise Japanese with me at our lunch break. During the time we were quickly running through two chapters, owner wechatted me asking if I had my lunch yet. Later I had my last tutorial for the day, but been hardly keeping my eyes open for almost half an hour. I bet my tutor saw me slowly going fishing>.> He even asked me to sleep earlier after the class when I went up to him asking for my result for my assignment.

I didn't get to think much who was sitting next to me the whole time til I turned around, and found that Tao was there next to me for nearly 40 minutes in the library. As we planned before, he would meet up with me at 4:30ish as soon as he finished labing, hence I didn't even notice he came much earlier. I got freaked out right after I found that he was watching me to do my work =3= This naughty naughty person laughed at my epic reaction....

We joked around the gremlin picture, the one I made it as a comparison between the real gremlin face and his look pretty alike at some extent. I also pointed at that fluffy chubby body in the image, while pointing at his fluffy jumper he wore and saying that they have something in common. Amusingly, he said that's the chest hair lol...=3= 

Ok...the last bit in this post is about this sense of guilt I had for the whole conversation with panpan tonight. I would think of that as a goodbye conversation to end our relationship. I know it's really selfish of me to make such a decision much earlier and that I never had this gut to tell him that I had already given up...But I truly understand that this won't work, maybe love doesn't mean that you have to stay with this person for good. Why not leave it for the better? Let someone go might be the best answer. When you have nothing in return, and that you are the one contributing much more than the other person, definitely you'll be suffering much more. This is not something new to know. I bet that it was wrong of me to hurt another person this badly. But I sincerely wish that he could find a better one, at least she won't be like me who doesn't have this connection with him most of the time. Thanks for everything you've done for me in this 1 year and 9 months. I seriously would not want to lose this person in my life, since he is also one of the them has been supporting me in some ways. Hence I really hope that we could still stay friends...Lastly, take care, time will heal...Bye bye panpan...I'll miss you...