Talk (15th of Feb)

Something might have gone too rough and wild, if you get what I mean lool *winks*

However our talk was amazing. A drink, two seats and a super long talk for a few hours like yesterday when we were lying on the lawn. He told me so much about his HSC period, I told him about mine. In the beginning I wasn't in a mood to talk, but I tried to stimulate some interest to talk even though there are still so many uncertainties and insecure feeling everytime when I talk to this person. As usual, he wanted to know about something I have never mentioned before such as my hidden past, my hidden dark side about me, and some hidden facts and people that I try not to bring them up in a conversation. I did tell him about my farewell party in Melbourne where I had no choice to decide where I lived, but left for China for another two years. We seriously talked a lot, teased each other as well. And it was quite obvious when I dodged some questions by fiddling around. He has spent all his time waiting for some truths to be revealed yet I still don't think that'll be a right time to tell him all that. He has asked me to tell him a bit more, yet he's the one always has taken over the whole conversation without him notice. It was a great talk that we didn't even realise what time it was, we even forgot that we were going there for having a dinner in the food court. It was almost 9 already, we only ordered a bowl of laksa for sharing. Later I was mad at him being so stingy of the meal when I ate a bit more than him, he said that I should have told him to order another one. We just can't reach a mutual agreement in most of the time as our perspectives are way too different from one another. I said never mind as per usual, he then asked me to explain. Anyways, same questions were asked and told once again, and it wasn't really a happy time on the train when here came with a dilemma to whether I should answer a serious question asked by him, because for me, it was as though making a promise to someone that I find not trustworthy enough to tell him what I really think. By talking about marriage, that could be a really remote possibility...maybe someone is so innocent to idealise a great picture of his future marriage in a way that he hasn't thought about other things that come with love, such as the growth of maturity that I want to see from him. It was serious enough, like one of those serious talks I have with someone else, but I don't think that such a serious talk will happen between us that often, as we tend to sadden it at the end at times.